Scottish Election: Labour Offer SFA

A leadership entirely out of touch with the needs of the consumer.

A belligerent refusal to listen to any sort of reason.

An arrogant belief that it doesn’t matter how badly you build it, they’ll come anyway. Because, hey, that’s what they’ve always done.

A fixation with how things are done “down south” with no apparent realisation that Scotland’s experience and England’s experience no longer bear direct comparison.

An inability to bring even basic articulacy to the simplest of messages.

An internal structure that’s not fit for purpose.

A jobs for the boys culture that rewards loyalty over ability.

A resistance to change of any sort.

An ignorant aversion to learning the lessons of the past and a delight in revelling in that ignorance.

A suffocating negativity.

May 5th 2011.

The day Scottish Labour finally morphed into the SFA.

Maybe even worse.

Somewhere in a laboratory in Haddington a crazed scientist has taken George Peat’s least attractive traits, added them to the less charismatic and inspiring strands of Neil Doncaster’s personality and created Iain Gray.

Like the SFA, like the SPL, there were then people within Scottish Labour who saw in this absurd concotion a man capable of leading, of inspiring, of getting things back on track.

And, just like the Scottish footballing authorities, we look on and say “hell mend them.”

This was a drubbing, a hammering, a blootering. A walloping.

Just a few weeks ago Labour led in the polls. Defending a lead they chose, with Iain Gray, to play Coco the Clown in goals, pausing only to bathe his big clownish hands in butter before sending him to the field.

Faced with a historically dominant force Alex Salmond’s SNP have overcome not only the weight of electoral tradition but the electoral system itself to grind Labour into the ground.

This is Dundee United winning the SPL by 40 points and connecting with the fans of every other club in the country along the way.

Not all Salmond’s own work.

He benefitted from the Liberal Democrats becoming the electoral equivalent of Auchenshoogle under-10s competing in the Champions League.

And Annabel Goldie – the Conservative’s very own Craig Brown – found her unique mix of common sense, whimsy and Women’s Institute scones fell short.

Salmond made a mockery of the prediction that he'd need to rely on the breakthrough of smaller parties to build a pro-independence majority. Just as well as support for the Greens drifted away like a Hamilton Accies crowd.

But let’s ca’ canny here.

There’s no footballing equivalent of Salmond, no comparable personality who can grab the opportunity and no democratic process that allows us to deliver to George Peat the weighty boot up the backside both he and Iain Gray so richly deserve.

An impressive achievement for Salmond and his party – come on, it’s really his show - though.

Mind you, if you think it’s strange how people with zero experience of professional football can infiltrate the higher echelons of the SFA’s byzantine structures just wait until you see the make up of this parliament.

Labour have been driven back so far they’re relying on regional list candidates, the rejects and leftovers, a motley crew indeed. The SNP’s success means they will be drawing on a hitherto unexplored talent pool.

A seismic shift but one unlikey to be accompanied by an immediate injection of quality. This could be the Holyrood version of Scotland sending a team made up of Dundee’s ballboys to the World Cup.

A new dawn, a new day. And interesting times ahead.

Salmond’s mission, should he choose to accept it (and he probably will, given the monumental boost that already sizeable ego has just been given) is simple.

Time for him to prove that Scotland only win the World Cup when the SNP are in government.

We’re waiting, Eck.

Dave, David, Hibs and politics

So David Cameron endured the "exquisite agony" of watching England crash out of the World Cup in the company of German Chancellor Angela Merkel.

Any football fan who supports Aston Villa because their grandfather was once the chairman will know exactly how he feels.

He’s also in favour of goalline technology. Because it works in cricket and tennis. That’s me sold.

As the Prime Minister showed solidarity with football fans in defeat Jeremy Hunt, Secretary of State for Culture, Olympics, Media and Sport, was opening up old wounds with a misinformed comment about Hillsborough.

He’s apologised. But he either has a worrying lack of knowledge or he retains a particularly old Tory view of the game. It doesn’t inspire confidence.

Should we be surprised?

The Conservatives launched a manifesto for sport before the election. They seemed keen to offer football fans a reassuring hug:

Enabling football fans to get involved in running their clubs

We support the moves towards fan ownership that have been made at clubs such as AFC Wimbledon, Brentford and Exeter City and on a more limited scale at countless other clubs.

This model allows fans to invest in ownership stakes in their clubs, giving supporters more influence over clubs’ activities, while in turn allowing clubs to attract equity to raise capital rather than relying on debt. This helps to create a more sustainable financial footing and to prevent some of the severe debt problems some clubs have faced.

In recognition of the benefits of this approach, we will:

Reform the football governance arrangements so co-operative ownership models can be established by supporters, as part of a wider package of reform of football finance and governance.

It is certainly symbolic of the strange relationship between football and politics that a Conservative manifesto pledges a commitment to "co-operative ownership models."

Time will judge their dedication to this pledge.

But the past few days might offer some evidence that this is not much more than window dressing.

It’s not often that an internal Conservative Party appointment piques the interest of football fans.

But eyebrows were raised at Easter Road when David Rowland was announced as the new party treasurer.

Could David "Spotty" Rowland, former tax exile and son of a scrap metal dealer, be the same David “Spotty” Rowland, Monaco resident and son of a scrap metal dealer, who came so close to selling Hibs into oblivion?

It appears so.

Rowland's involvement in the deal that installed David Duff - then a shady businessman, now a convicted fraudster - as chairman of Hibs brought the club to the brink of oblivion:

[David Duff] also talks freely about the links between him and Monaco-based multi-millionaire Mr David Rowland, who lent him the necessary further £800,000 to finance the buyout of Hibs, and who later received a gift of 30% of Hibs from Mr Duff in return for his ''expertise''.

This was transferred via a Panamanian-registered company owned by Mr Rowland and his family, and was worth about £1.2m as the club was then valued at £4m, Mr Duff tells reporter George Hume, of BBC Scotland's investigative programme Focal Point.

It was another of Mr Rowland's companies, Monaco, that lent Mr Duff's Highmace Ltd the original £800,000. This was paid back, with interest at commercial rates, when Hibs plc went public.

Fans bought 62.5% of the available shares at that time, and £2m was raised for the new company. Since then, Hibs - who were looking for new investments in the leisure business - had the "great good fortune" to hear about a chain of hotels and wine bars in the South-west of England.

They bought the company, Avon Inns, for £4m in cash and about #1.6m worth of Hibs shares. The money was raised by a rights issue and Avon Inns were on the books of one of Mr Rowland's companies, Inoco, as a non-performing loan.

Rowland’s willingness to sell that 30% stake to Wallace Mercer gave the Hearts chairman the incentive he needed to pursue his ultimately doomed takeover bid in 1990.

Despite the vociferous and emotional Hands Off Hibs campaign Rowland could not be persuaded of the historical and emotional resonance of Hibs’ place in Scottish football.

Other board members, Rowland’s wife Sheila among them, conceded that the display of spirit from the Hibs fans, the mobilisation of the Hibs community in Leith and beyond, persuaded them to vote against Mercer's bid. But Rowland wouldn’t budge.

Even a year later, with Hibs £7 million in debt, he refused to cede control to Tom Farmer. Only when the club went into receivership was Rowland finally ousted.

What was that pledge?

"Giving supporters more influence over clubs’ activities, while in turn allowing clubs to attract equity to raise capital rather than relying on debt."

If we’re to judge David Cameron by the company he keeps I suspect we shouldn't hold our breath.

David Rowland is not unknown to politics. Here's an Early Day Motion from 1991:

That this House is concerned that Hibs, the famous Scottish football team, is in difficulties; notes that lawyer David Duff and shady financier David Rowland involved the club in loss-making deals, although they made millions; realises that the Hibs shares are virtually worthless, despite substantial backing from the working-class community in Leith and Edinburgh; believes that the fans should conduct their own inquiry into recent wheeling and dealing; and supports a rescue plan which recognises that football is a sport and not a plaything of big business.

Tory Party Treasurer isn't a job you really apply for. Details of Mr Rowland's position clinching, and eye watering, donations to the party here.

I got the heads up on this from Hibs.net